4 am.

*WARNING – this post is not going to make sense to you.*  OOh. and beware of typos.

You may preoceed.

#1

its four in the bloody morning men and theres a RAT. in my ROOM.  well there was, anyway. I managed to death stare it out of my room, yes i am THAT powerful. who am i kidding. i picked josh up, screamed and ran, and then tip toed back to switch on the lights and the bugger was staring at me from the wooden panels above the window (i knwo they have a proper name but i have noooo idea what it is.0) fudge bucket. yesh so s actually stood at the doorway and yelled at it a few times. like “GO!” or… “SHOO, u BUGGER!”and finall it left the room.

#2

Aiyo! lots been going on men. Im not creative. time to start looking for alternatives or something to inspire me. I hate the work ive been doing and the thing is i know i can do work thats so much better, but im stuck, my brain is giving up on me. Lifes getting hard now, and my whole systems struggling to adapt to it, i’m getting all rebellious and indecisive and i hate it.

#3

someone recently said something to me which may actually have been obvious to the world at large and i had seriously not thought about it that way in ages. He said “relationships dont have to be about sex.  If you really love each other you should be able to not have sex and be ok with that.”  is it true? There was a time in my life when i idealized just the way he does, and i think thats one of the reasons i enjoy his company that much. he reminds me of the way i used to think before my life exploded in front of me. he’s great. he sings to me and BOY do i I love being sung to. I mean who doesn’t?

#4

i dont ever want to be tagged as a ‘mistake’ in someones life. I’m moving on now. I have to force myself. but Im moving on. Lifes too short. When did i have to start have to apologize for doing things that i love to do, that i WANT to do?

#5

complete blah post. this is not going to make sense. just typing out shit that in my fully awake state i would never type and hit publish. but then again e actually saying that makes me sound more conscious than i really want to appear therefore make\ing this seem like a highly pre-meditated post of jelly bellies and care bears. I should put a warning at the top just in case someone dies of boredom in the midst of reading this. that. would be. uncool. I should probably go now. *yawn* or I’ll never wake up in time for work tomorrow.

sigh

i think im……. just… gonna *zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*